So True

"Tonight I'm So Alive..."

I think only two people in this world know why I went to bed last night so happy... and relieved.

Mine :)

There's Something to be Said for Sympathy Pains...

See?

Monday

It doesn't seem like Monday at all... I fell asleep fairly quickly last night and then slept through the night like a log, with one steady dream that, although wierd, was not a nightmare. I woke up to my roommate's cell-phone alarm, which goes off one or two minutes before mine when it's set at 7:30. Then I lay in bed for five minutes before gathering together the strength to get up. At any rate, it just doesn't feel like a whole night passed and therefore, how can it be Monday? I'd like some blissful unconciousness for a once...

Snapper tonight :)

"You Make This All Go Away..."

I slept much better last night. Well. When I was sleeping anyway.

For Someone

(I know who you are)

"Trouble with your heart? Get it removed... then you'll have no more problems."

Words Echo

...and she had just lured us into her room to kill us when we lay down together, to sacrifice us, and we were locked in and even though my back was turned I started to scream his name as I realized, to warn him, because she was coming back soon, but then someone said, out loud or in my head, "But he knows already... he lured you here."

And then I woke up, frozen, the words echoing in my mind, feeling betrayed, cold, unable to move, frozen, afraid to turn my back, and lay still until the images faded, and finally turned over and shivered until I fell asleep once more.

Call It A Daydream...

Dreamcatcher

Two perfect white feathers rest on the dirt, immaculate, quills delicately connected. The light, pale down at the base of each feather quivers with its own rhythm in the faint breeze. The breeze strengthens, and as the feathers begin to rise in an attempt to fly once more, she swiftly retrieves them and carefully wraps them in a tissue before putting them in a pocket and moving on with a smile.

At the edge of the forest she severs a young, pale sapling with a sickle knife pulled from her belt and a few whispered, soothing words to the living wood. She carries the cane with her free hand and stops only once more to pick up an empty, rusted instant-coffee can that lies, alien, in the tall grass. Tucking this under her arm, she carries these finds to her small cottage.

Inside, a long table waits. She places the undisturbed feathers on a corner and sits at the opposite end, setting the coffee can down and carefully examining the thin sapling. After a few moments, satisfied, she lays the branch down and produces her knife once more, cutting out a length of equal thickness with a murmured blessing. It is easily pliable, and she wraps the wood around the girth of the coffee can, tying the overlapping ends together with a length of thick waxy thread.

All is now ready, and quietly humming an ancient lay she begins to loop and knot the thread inside the ring of wood, forming a web. She pauses as the web progresses inward to slide a small, delicate bead of clear blue topaz onto the thread and work it into the net. After a few more rows, she adds a second bead of the same color, close to the center. At last the intricate tracery of pure white web is completed.

Only the feathers remain, and these she lifts delicately, tying thread around the base of the pair of feathers, knotting it and adorning the length of doubled thread with one last bead of topaz. She ties it to the base of the webbed ring and after adding another strand to the top of the ring, she hangs the talisman over her window.

Two perfect white feathers stir in the faint breeze, immaculate and delicate, ready to catch her dreams...

The Stars Are Also Fire

"--You: Law alone, sight unbloodied, and never a heart ripped loose for gods that never were. Death is no more than the stones that lie in the groundgrip of waterless wastelands; ever obedient whirl the worlds; their ways you will understand and their whys will be born of your brains. You have given yourselves to serve and master the steadiness of the stars.

But the dust of stones shall be bones, dry bones rising for a journey from doubt into darkness. Your forgotten begotten shall trouble your dreams, the heart shall break its cage, and death shall laugh at your law. For the stars are also fire.--"

He's New

Which Black Metal Band Are You?

I'm just going with a theme, I guess...


You are Enslaved


Which Black Metal Band Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

BLACK METAL WAS NOT MEANT FOR TOOTSIE POPS

Or was it?

Another Brick in the Wall, pt. 3

"I don't need no arms around me..."

Wait, yes I do...

Off to bed.

Shimmy

(That's what I'm listening to at the moment.)

Well, my Mondays have finally gotten better since I've dropped Stat (my 3-4pm class). Evenings are still Snapper-filled, but it's fun there :)

Tuesdays, however, are still kind of long and arduous. Bio lab from 3-5 will do that...

Goth stuff again

In keeping with the goth theme, I found these online. They made me chuckle.

*I'm so goth, in preschool, the only crayon I used was black.

*I'm so goth I dyed my belly button black.

*I'm so goth my black is blacker than your black. I call it "black black."

*I'm so goth, whenever I walk into a room, all the lights go out.

*I'm so goth I wear sunglasses when I open the refrigerator.

*I'm so goth I don't paint my nails black--I bash them with a hammer.

*I'm so goth I died and didn't notice.

*I'm so goth, whenever I knock on somebody's door they give me candy.

*I'm so goth, when I stop pouting, people ask, "What are YOU so happy about?"

*I'm so goth, when I go outside, the sun sets.

Sunday Bloody Sunday

Well, we did spend most of the day playing Sam's new "Ultimate Goth" game. I got a few things wrong that I knew, but I got considerably more right with somewhat wild guesses. And I won. It was, overall, quite enjoyable (:

But now I have classes again tomorrow.

Meh

I'm in a really bad mood, suddenly. Today kind of sucked, not to mention this wierd indigestion/ stomache ache/ heartburn that pretty much persisted throughout the day. I would just go to bed early, but I'm hungry. But I don't know what to eat. Go figure.

Opinions

Be nice.

Be honest.

Beer!

Mmm... Terry Pratchett...

"Well, basically there are two sorts of opera,' said Nanny, who also had the true witch's ability to be confidently expert on the basis of no experience whatsoever. 'There's your heavy opera, where basically people sing foreign and it goes like "Oh oh oh, I am dyin', oh, I am dyin', oh, oh, oh, that's what I'm doin'", and there's your light opera, where they sing in foreign and it basically goes "Beer! Beer! Beer! Beer! I like to drink lots of beer!", although sometimes they drink champagne instead. That's basically all of opera, reely."

Appropriate for Friday, I thought...

Amusing

Am I the only one who finds this funny?

Strawberry Cream Cheese

It always cheers me up a little (:

I'm still quite tired though... my roommate turning her light on and moving around (and then leaving for about an hour, leaving the light on, wtf?) kept me up until at least quarter of 1. Oh well, I gues...

Grrr

I was not amused by whoever prank-called me using the Napoleon Dynamite soundboard at 11pm. In fact, I am rather irritated, and there will be blood.

Indietits

indietits.com

Snow

Of course not even a delay resulted from this snowfall... but oh well... at least it's pretty.

Water, Water, Everywhere...

But not in my hallway! Apparently someone on Jason's floor/wing did something with a hanger to the sprinkler and broke the water main. Amazingly enough, it sounds like Jason's room is one of the few that actually stayed dry.

I really should stop leaving stuff all over the floor...

I am Wierd

You Are 30% Weird

Not enough to scare other people... But sometimes you scare yourself.

How Weird Are You?

Heheh.

Friday and Saturday

Well, the Stat. test yesterday was terrible. I looked over my notes and I still blanked on the really easy formula for z-scores! I'm really hoping my advisor recommends that I withdraw from the class... I won't know that until Monday though. The Spanish test wasn't too bad; but we'll see how well I actually did.

Today was getting up a little later than usual, eating breakfast amongst a crowd of young kids at Millersville for the 'Math Counts' program and telling Jason it would be bad to taser some of them, doing laundry, and making a little progress on my speech outline, powerpoint, and bibliography. I still have to put stuff on notecards so I don't get lost... ergh. I wish I had asked for a later date, but no, I had to go and say "no preference." Oh well. It finally started snowing! Snow makes me happy. Not so happy when I have to walk through it to the other end of campus to take pictures for The Snapper, though, haha.

And tomorrow is Jason day! (As The Snapper owns my soul and I will be there all of Tues. evening.)

Today So Far

Studied for Spanish and then finally got around to cleaning out my marauder account inbox! Feel virtuous. Did not study for Statisitics yet. Whoops.

Have I not said we can reach greatness? ;)

Avatar II

Although... this is more likely to be me, haha...

Avatar

If I had to pick an avatar it would be this:

Mmm... sword...

(Better quality image, and cooler-looking)

Hehe

Just found this online...

HOW TO GIVE A CAT A PILL:

1. Pick up cat and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a
baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth
and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As
cat opens mouth, pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and
swallow.

2. Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left
arm and repeat process.

3. Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away.

4. Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm, holding rear paws
tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth
with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.

5. Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call
spouse from garden.

6. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and
rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head
firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill
down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.

7. Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make
note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered
figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later.

8. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just
visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth
open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.

9. Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink 1 beer to
take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood
from carpet with cold water and soap.

10. Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed. Get another pill. Open another
beer. Place cat in cupboard, and close door onto neck, to leave head
showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat
with elastic band.

11. Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on
hinges. Drink beer. Fetch bottle of scotch. Pour shot, drink. Apply cold
compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus shot.
Apply whiskey compress to cheek to disinfect. Toss back another shot.
Throw Tee shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.

12. Call fire department to retrieve the darn cat from across the road.
Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid
cat. Take last pill from foil wrap.

13. Tie the little bastard's front paws to rear paws with garden twine
and bind tightly to leg of dining table. Find heavy duty pruning gloves
from shed. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of filet steak. Be
rough about it. Hold head vertically and pour 2 pints of water down
throat to wash pill down.

14. Consume remainder of scotch. Get spouse to drive you to the
emergency room, sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm
and removes pill remnants from right eye. Call furniture shop on way
home to order new table.

15. Arrange for SPCA to collect mutant cat from hell and call local pet
shop to see if they have any hamsters.

HOW TO GIVE A DOG A PILL:

1. Wrap it in cheese.

Stress

Stress level: 85%
Exhaustion:10%
Other: 5%

I can't believe it's Wednesday...

Look Up...

"Earth conquered
Gives the stars."

Boethius

In dark clouds
Hidden
The stars can shed
No light.
If boisterous winds
Stir the sea
Causing a storm,
Waves once crystal
Like days serene
Soon turn opaque
And think with mud
Prevent the eye
Piercing the water.
Streams that wander
From tall hills
Down Descending
Often dash
Against a rock
Torn from the hillside.
If you desire
To look on truth
And follow the path
With unswerving course,
Rid yourself
Of joy and fear,
Put hope to flight,
And banish grief.
The mind is clouded
And bound in chains
Where these hold sway.

:(

Apparently indigestion and whatever else was going on with me last night causes nightmares...

:(

Straight Through the Heart

Hanging from the cobwebs in your mind
It looks like a long long way to fall
No one ever told me life was kind
I guess I never heard it
I never heard it all
Living in a world of make believe
I can hide behind what's real
But wearing your emotions on your sleeve
And they all know what you feel
And here it comes again
"Straight through the heart
Straight through the heart
Oh never tell a secret with your eyes
It's the eyes that let you down
Tell a little truth with many lies
It's the only way I've found
Oh here it comes again
Straight through the heart
Straight through the heart
Shout to the wind
How can you hurt me this way
Oh once it begins
It looks like it's coming to stay..."

Some Insecurities:

Being seen as insecure
Being laughed at
Being judged
Being ignored
Being treated lightly
Being talked about
Being awkward

“Being” is kind of a funny word when you read it over and over…

I Don't Know...

"Say my name
Ease the pain
Clear the smoke
In my head."

Googlisms!

Googlisms for: carla

carla is unimpressed
carla is cute as a button
carla is to better understand the connection between language and culture with support from a variety of disciplines
carla is the new name to add to this list of bizarre and unique women
carla is the superstitious and spunky barmaid who played off diane’s snobbery
carla is a fellow psychic/intuitive
carla is finally coming
carla is built on top of an old 17th century graveyard
carla is helping him
carla is awful
carla is a genuine renaissance girl
carla is partially deaf
carla is primarily interested in urban sociology
carla is currently involved in researching deathbed visions
carla is guilty
carla is adrift without him
carla is unit #2039 at mission de los arroyos
carla is in the middle above
carla is baffling
carla is waiting for her boyfriend
carla is a regular on the new canadian prime time soap "paradise falls" airing on showcase
carla is amazing
carla is just an added incentive
carla is soft spoken
carla is no penthouse pet
carla is very musical and has a great sense of melody and harmony
carla is blessed with a great range and breath control
carla is interested
carla is the vision and womanpower behind zena moon
carla is a good teacher
carla is willing to take the chance of getting her heart broken
carla is of her lack of social graces

Uhm... yep...

Still procrastinating!

Take the quiz:
What animal were you in a past life?

Panther
Nice. You're a panther. Silent, deadly, lives in the forest, what more could you want? The balance/senses of a cat, the ability to spell pretty good, and you might even have a few friends! Online is good. The internet is good for you. but stop going on so often, you're a bit anti-social. Go out with some friends sometime.

We Can Reach Greatness

It's amazing how much I get done while avoiding essay-writing... I mean... really.

Jealousy

If jealousy makes someone a horrible person, then the world is filled with horrible people...

Somehow I find that comforting.

"Dreamtime is Over..."

"Gonna let the lightning
Tuck me into my bed
Gonna let that man
Let him into my head
I’ll see you in my dreams
Electrified and cherry red..."

Coming Out of a Fog...

A Scanner Darkly

I just finished reading Philip K. Dick's A Scanner Darkly, the fourth book of his that I've read. For some reason the ending and reading some the Author's Note on the last few pages just touched me... his books have a way of taking you through intense emotional convolutions and then ending them. It's like suddenly coming out of seeing a beautiful vision of hell...

Conversations

I seem to be in a copy-pasting conversations mood lately... I guess my life is just that amusing...

me: hehehe I love my friends... we have the greatest conversations....
me:so you were drunk last night while I was away?
Benjamin: oh christ
Benjamin: I came online didn't I?

Jason: lol
me: he doesn't remember at all
me: this is fun
me: I should have made stuff up
Jason: that would be mean
Jason: you should have
me: somehow I'm not surprised
me: but bad jason :P
Jason: :-P
me: :P :P
Jason: :-P :-P :-P :-P :-P :-P :-P :-P :-P :-P :-P :-P :-P :-P :-P :-P :-P :-P
me: :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P * infinity ^(3+n) n= all known positive integers

Thanks, I think...

Ira: Sleep tight, don't let the demons in your closet drag your soul off to hell!

Us and Them

it's unsafe but I will protect you

explodingdog

3 months

Strange to think about it... but Jason and I have been together for three months now...

(: